"Hugged by God"

When I was very young, my dad became an electronic technician. John, a friend of my dad, convinced my dad to get his CET license and work for him and his partner. The first 3 CET's in New York was in their ads. One day my dad brought home a zenith console tube record player / radio / 8 track tape player. A person left it at the shop to get fixed and never picked it up. Everybody loved it. I was 6 years old. One of my favorite songs as a kid was "Heavenly Father" by Maranatha band. I would sit in this tall armchair with huge headphone’s on that would cover my ears & cheeks. Every time I would listen to the song, it felt like Abba giving me a giant hug. I would play it over and over again. A couple months later my cousin Mike asked to borrow it. Almost every day I would bug my mom for it back. Finally she told me what happened. His 8track player in his car ate it. My mom knew how much I love that song. I was crushed. He promised to replace it but never did. I would get to hear it on the radio once in a while but my heart was changing anyway. Even though every sunday the family had to be together for bible study, my heart was still walking away from Abba. I would always talk to Abba as a kid but by the time I was in my teens, I would talk to Abba only once in a while. To me people were hypocrites and all had agendas for themselves. I trusted no one. I was turning into a person with agendas of my own. My own will not his. Abba did not give up on me. At age 22 he ambushed me and started to change my heart. I rededicated my life to him. He took the desire of karate right out of me and had me to go to college. Growing up I hated school. Ironically, I hardly ever got sick. I was always the one that went to school. I signed up for Junior College of Albany’s Elite Art curriculum in Spring of 94’ Abba wanted me to go to HVCC. I refused and went to JCA. I was in total disobedience. I knew I walked away from Abba. Everything went bad including my health. I was broken. I cried out to him and 3 weeks later he started to change things before my eyes. I started at HVCC in fall of 94’ He also show me some of the blessing I missed from my disobedience and put me thru another test on trusting him. I came back around that mountain again and this time passed. He also started to give me a desire to read. Reading is defiantly not my strong point and would avoid it whenever I could. I first started to read Max lucado’s “When God whispers your name.” My favorite chapter was “When a cricket makes you cranky.” Abba was starting to realign my heart to his will. Then I read “six hours one Friday”. I started to read the chapter when Yeshua was on the cross and how he had to forgive everyone. I cried for 2 days. I finally had learned true forgiveness. Abba had touch my heart at that moment and I felt his love again just like when I was sitting in that tall armchair getting hugged.